SHE WAS LESBIAN WICCA
(My Sunglasses Were Burger King)
I.
She was lesbian Wicca
My sunglasses were Burger King
This would pose a challenge
To our church retreat fling.
|
Her plan was to convert us
Baptist Fundamentalists
Mine was to baptize her
And tie her up by her wrists.
|
II.
My tastes run to girls, too
And Christian evangelism
But it was my sense of fashion
That created the first schism.
|
She mixed me up a potion
That smelled of formaldehyde
So from the sun's blinding rays
I'd no longer need to hide.
|
III.
Breaking my sad addiction
To Burger King design
Required all of Saturday
Leaving precious little time.
|
To work my own little magic
A deviously sly trick
To break her sad addiction
To muff-diving broomsticks.
|
IV.
Sunday would be our big day
For converting the heathens
By dunking them in water
We'd pave their way to Heaven.
|
When came my witch's turn
To bathe in holy water
It took the entire church
To hold her body under.
|
She screamed to Holy Jesus!
Swallowed by fire and brimstone
I found myself much aroused
As the Devil took her home.
|
V.
I think of her quite often
As I'm staring at the sun
Where would my life be
Without her magic potion?
|
|
