THE MENNONITE ANGLE
There once was a time I thought I had knocked|
This living the life star-spangled
But there was an item hopelessly blocked
Just one thing that I could not wangle.
The minor issue of finding a chick|
One who's not way too new-fangled
All of my angling had yet turned the trick
In this land where Nature gets mangled.
Each and every American girl|
With whom I've been entangled
Maintained an air of Queen of the World
In spite of the charms that I dangled.
I knew that with a mail-order bride|
Big Yankee dollars I'd jangle
But then, for sure, with one year stateside
She'd go completely star-spangled.
The chance remained for monastic vows|
To hear church bells hourly jangled
Losing my life in devotional bows
My manhood an appendage that dangled.
Instead God sent me a masterful angler|
From a land where everything's wangled
He knew that just a world-class wrangler
My love life could have untangled.
Lured to America by Hollywood flicks|
That fueled his own dreams star-spangled
It took him but one round with our chicks
To realize how sadly they're mangled.
'They'd never act this way in Italy!'|
He cried, aghast at these women new-fangled
'If they behaved with such importunity
They would by their mothers be strangled!'
That's when he spied tame pastel-frocked lasses|
Singing with brass bells a-jangle
How better they seemed then that which passes
For women in outfits star-spangled.
Without heading home he returned to his roots|
That of a masterful wangler
To find himself a suitable toots
He'd re-emerge as an Old World angler.
'Like foxes set loose in glorious henhouse|
With such angels we must entangle
The only way to snag a real spouse
Is to work The Mennonite Angle!'