So far you're batting a thousand percent|
Every single encounter with you bad
To spew foul badness to such an extent
Surely disqualifies you as my Dad
I might could put you into a novel
As a villain you'd inspire disbelief
I'd disguise you with a name like Evel
But readers would cry for some relief
"How could he be so thoroughly hellish?"
They would complain in much ado bother
"Every moment with him is nightmarish!"
"Yes" I'd say "Imagine him your father."
As a father you are incredible
As pulp fiction you'd be inedible.