WHEN GOD TOOK THE BOTTLE AWAY
To stop the ringing
I answer the phone
Somebody screams my name
"You better come quick
She's shuckin' her dress
And puttin' the family to shame."
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"That must be Mary"
I think to myself
All liquored-up at the bar
Swingin' from rafters
And dancin' on tables
But this time she's gone too far.
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I get there so quickly
I catch her brassiere
Before it brushes the floor
I grab my sister
And reclaim her dress
Then drag her proudly through the door.
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The very next morning
We wake to a CRASH!
In the kitchen we find a truck
It looks like my brother
But it's so hard to tell
In the oven he's got his head stuck.
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With her head throbbin'
Mary falls to her knees
"No way I'll end up like Jim!"
Right then and there
She gives up the drinkin'
So she won't get stuck like him.
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CHORUS
Swingin' and flashin'
They're all in the past
She sits demurely today
Heaven Above
Brought Sweet Mary back
When God took the bottle away.
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"But where is Mother?"
We wonder aloud
As they take our Jim away
It's Sunday mornin'
And we're headed to church
We need her help to pray.
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That's when the phone rings
"Not again!" I say
The gendarmes are callin' from France
"We have your Mother
She just robbed a bank
Come when you get the chance."
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"Mon dieu! and Sacre bleu!"
I say in bad French
"We'll get there as soon as we can
What with my brother
Crashin' up the house
This really screws up the plan."
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She'd flown to Cleveland
She'd walked out on checks
She'd done her share of crazy things
But flyin' to France
And robbin' a bank
Looks like the monster sprouted wings.
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I recall the day
Our sweet papa died
He shivered to death in the rain
I remember the way
Our whole family cried
I thought that we'd die of the pain.
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That's when I figgered
"That's how drunks go"
I never touched the stuff again
That was the moment
I realized I
Could break my link in the chain.
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CHORUS
Sneakin' and wreakin'
They're all in the past
I'm dry as a camel today
Sweet baby Jesus
Gave my spirit back
When God took the bottle away.
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Gathered in Paris
We speak to the judge
"It's the booze made her act so"
"She must get sober
And never come back"
We agree, so he lets her go.
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CHORUS
Flyin' and stealin'
That's all in the past
We stay together today
Thanks to the angels
We got our mamma back
When God took the bottle away.
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At papa's grave
The family gathers
Jim in a full-body cast
Amidst the sobs
He makes the promise
"All that carousin's in the past."
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CHORUS
Drinkin' and dyin'
That's all in the past
We're huggin' and kissin' today
The sweet Lord Jesus
Brought my family back
When God took the bottle away.
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